sophia

beyond that glass wall
to who you really are
beyond the guarded and fearful
the mist that surrounds a mystery

the ice that covers and blurs a beautiful form
will i find anything? or maybe i wont be let in
and i wonder on if im overbearing
so i look on far from the outside

sophia, how you roll in thoughts
how your name hangs around longer than it should
beautiful, more so than how anyone thinks of you

burnt by ice now and then
i could be imagining or maybe its real
the closer i get the more guarded

the coolness belies something more
someone i havent known

sophia, sophia, how much more will we know
sophia sophia, i must admit, youre beauty has caught my eye
will i be content just looking on from where i am?

the distance that aches
pain and longing these i know
i was there years before
should the tears ever fall
should the pain be too much to bear
cry out, let them fall,
its ok, we're human anyway

the journey to manhood costs so much
yet this chapter isnt enough
surely there must be a better way
surely this isnt the only way

here you walk down the path i once trod upon
press one dear brother, dear friend
i know how its like to long
when the close of the chapter seems so long

Jesus walks, yes He does, for you as He did with me
take heart dear brother, He never gives up
when the tears and blood flow,
when pain and missings overwhelm
He's more than the balm
He's your lion of judah

this God who took me through the storms
the endless muck and mud
is yours as well
march on, knowing He will cause this
to become good somehow.

here in my prayers i remember you
i know He'll answer them, i know
He never ignores any cry
press on dear brother
know that when you cry
i cry with you too.

who are You? this i cry out in the night
when tears speak beter than words
the night that envelopes and swallows
who are You? this i want to know

is there really a light that shines in the darkness?
the warmth that pays the wrath
the love that is given freely
how hurt my soul is, how do i receive

do i believe? how can i?
the things that surround arent ever uplifting
i dont have the strength to take Your beating
how do i cling on?

the waters did part, the earth was made
You formed me. i find it so hard to see You
the obstacles overwhelm, the scars run too deep
i cant hear in the chaos, i cant see when im blinded

do i belive? oh i want to say strongly i do
who are You? is there true love?

the long road that beckons
on this rocky place i travel on
failing to leave some bags behind
it weighs on me so.
time doesnt wait.

suddenly i find a cold place in a warm heart
where few dare venture, fewer enter
the shadows of yesteryear loom
once chased away now back again

the long road that i take, who knows where it leads
the wait i have, is it even worth it?

the picks that chip away the ice
the spiked boots and sore ankles.
seeing a face i used to know
dreaming of dreams that have made this a nightmare.

birthday wish

oh for the things that money can buy
new clothes, new looks, new rides
the friends and a party organised
some noise some sounds
that perhaps would drown out
how i really feel

this one wish that money cant buy
one desire, for anyone
for that shoulder to cry on
wont you tell me everything's ok
especially when i feel ever so lonely

would you watch and quiet me
when the tears pour, when they fall
i look ahead and i dont see much to look forward to
perhaps just a hand to hold.
and a shoulder to bear these burdens.

this wish of mine, how sad it is
how sad it is.

now set free i run the plains
time runs short, it wont wait for me
here i wont chase after nothing
i run for You, and i run after You

the chains that fall
the liberation i havent felt in awhile
no guilt on me i run free

now set free i run this race
for the prize that lies ahead

rose

lovee is like a rose without the flower
it hrts when you get closer
when you want to give up
the thorns stab your heart
how can i hold on? the bleeding won't stop

it hurts me so to choose
i want to hold on
but it's getting messy
i cant hold them in seeing you hurt

why is love full of thorns
its something i cant grasp
all i want is to be there
but i'm all messed up

love is like a rose without the flower
green, ugly, selfish and sour
how can it blind anyone?
i want to drown out its sound

i'm holding onto the thorns
i'm bleeding, my heart crying
it hurts me bu i want to hold on

*an old piece from around '05*

elizabeth

sixty miles an hour from orchad to admiralty
twenty times your name came to mind
with all my memories of yesterday's me
somehow i can't shake them away,
somehow i can't help but reminisce

ten tears fell one by one
and i only had six words to say to you
but you wouldn't hear them, you couldn't feel me
you left too suddenly, too soon
leaving me behind with whats left of us

thank you for loving me elizabeth
for always watching for me
whay did you stay so long with me
if you had left earlier, i wouldnt be feeling
the pain i'm going through now

two hours on the wheel
one ring on my right hand
the tears never dry
what am i to do darling?
you left so soon, i wasn't ready


*an old piece from the year before*
"but how prophetic, how i feel it so, even now, yes even now"

See You At Sunrise

The rain keeps pouring, I don't know when it'll end
my dusk never breaks, my dawn never coming
but I'll press on, no matter how long the tunnel is,
I know I'll see the light

I fall, I stumble
my face wet with rain, tears, mud and humuliation
but the darkest clouds won't stop me
the deepest cuts won't slow me
no matter how long the night lasts,
I know I'll see the light

The dusk will break, night will end and maybe not even todayy
but I'll press on, with knowledge that the sun exists
I know I'll see the light
See you at sunrise

I know I won't be flying
I ain't afraid of raining
ain't nothing gonna stop me
rain, storms,hail or heat
I'll move on till my body gives
the light still shines
I know i'll see it

See you at sunrise



*an old piece from a few years before*

"i know the sun exists, i will press on, i'll see you at sunrise."